31st August

Caligula, the Roman Emperor who was madder than all the rest, was born today in 12AD.

And a lot of people wished he hadn't been!

In other news ...

Van Morrison was also born today, but a little bit after Caligula - in 1945, in fact. I only mention the fact because I don't understand the cult of (white) Van man. We have Van Gogh, Van Johnson, Van Morrison, Van Diesel, Van Dango.

It's all Vanity, I suppose.

30th August

Denis Healey was born today in 1917. Who? I hear you cry, gentle reader. He was a Labour MP, Cabinet Minister and Chancellor of the Exchequer with the bushiest eyebrows in politics. He was mercilessly lampooned by the impressionist Mike Yarwood with the immortal phrase 'Silly Billy'. So, happy birthday, Denis, 95 today.

In other news ...
Marcus Antonius committed suicide today in Alexandria in 30BC. He'd just lost a war against Octavius Caesar and not even his famous wife, Cleopatra, could shake him out of his depression. He did 'what's fine, what's Roman' (that's your actual Shakespeare) after his bodyservant refused to kill him with his sword.

Incidentally, there's a rather good bio of Cleopatra out shortly from Constable Robinson in their Brief History of ... series, by my old mate MJ Trow.

29th August

The British flagship The Royal George went down in the Solent today in 1782 with the loss of over 800 people, several of them civilians. The George was careening (that's having its bottom scraped - don't snigger, Seven Eff Dee) when it rolled over. Rear Admiral Richard Kempenfelt was on board and went down with it. Who was to blame? The ship's captain and first officer, neither of whom were on board at the time. Were the punished? Of course not, the British navy let them off! What an institution!

In other news ...
On this day in 1918 6000 British policemen (there weren't any women - sorry ex WPC Carpenter) went on strike today over pay. They were warming up for a much bigger effort the following year.

Aren't our policemen wonderful? Not necessarily ...

28th August

Charles Darrow died today in 1967 (although some sources say it was tomorrow). Who he? I hear you cry. Let's just say he went to jail, did not pass go and owned a great deal of property in Mayfair and Whitechapel.

Got it now? That's right. He was the inventor of Cluedo.

In other news ...
Today in 1850 the Channel telegraph cable was laid between Dover and Cap Gris Nez.

Why?

27th August

When told he was about to die today in 1635, the Spanish playwright Lope de Vega said, 'All right, I'll say it: Dante makes me sick.'

I'm made of much sterner stuff. I don't need to wait for my death bed to shout from the rooftops - 'I don't like semolina!'

Gutsy cutting edge or what?

In other news ...
Today in 1987, a Chinese girl who had been brought up by a family of pigs returned to normal life after three years training.
How can anybody who has read Animal Farm be surprised by this?

26th August

I tell the story to my GCSE classes and AS aspirants every year. At Crecy on this day in 1346, Edward III and his son the Black Prince took on a French force twice their size and destroyed it. At one point when the Prince's flank was under heavy attack, he sent a messenger to his father asking for reinforcements. The king said, 'Let the boy win his spurs' and sent him nothing. Why do I tell this story to my GCSE and AS candidates? Because the Black Prince was their age - 16 - at the time.

They don't make them like him any more.

In other news ...
I shouldn't tell half my readers about this in case they create a copy cat situation. Today in 1970 women went on strike in New York and the city stopped. Don't have nightmares, chaps, but can you imagine? No tea in bed? No full English? No cleaned house, ironed shirts, washed car, walked dog, gourmet dinner ... I can't go on because this is a family blog!

25th August

Today in 1919 the first scheduled flight took place between London and Paris. A souffleuse (female whistler) was employed to entertain the (presumably terrified) passengers. It was very noticeable that everyone wanted to fly from Paris to London and not vice versa.

In other news ..
'Is Paris burning?' Hitler asked today in 1940 as the Wehrmacht took the French capital. This was an 'in' joke really. Napoleon, a century and a half earlier, said 'If I made one mistake in my life it was not to bomb Berlin.'

24th August

Mount Vesuvius erupted today in 79AD and the ash and molten lava completely engulfed the towns of Pompeii and Herculaneum. The loss of life was of course appalling but every volcanic ash cloud has a silver lining. Today we know immeasurably more about 1st century Rome than we would have done if there had been no eruption and Pompeii and Herculaneum just grew into modern towns, replete with bars and pizza joints.

When the Mem and I visited Naples (before you ask, don't bother ...) we visited both Pompeii and Herculaneum and though both are wonderful, enjoyed the latter the most. There were no school parties (a huge plus as far as I am concerned) and in fact, no other visitors but us. At Herculaneum, you really get the feeling of the depth of the ash, as it is literally carved out of the ground and also many of the original tools left by the original excavators in the eighteenth century are lying next to their abandoned work, as if the archaeologists have just popped out for lunch. Two historical goose pimple moments for the price of one!

In other news ...
Now, this will upset people, but George Stubbs was born today in 1724. It's not his birth that will upset you, but my next statement. George Stubbs was not the world's greatest horse painter. All his animals have tiny, greyhound-like heads and virtually no ears. There! I've said it. And, do you know, I feel a lot better.

23rd August

Napoleon wrote to his adopted son Eugene de Beauharnais today in 1810, saying 'My principle is: France before everything.'
Well, everything except grabbing everybody else's country, selling his own troops down the river, Creole women and, as the great Sellar and Yeatman put it in 1066 And All That, 'standing like that.'

In other news ...

Alaric and his Visigoths destroyed Rome today in 410, ending seven centuries of culture and civilization. Actually, that's not quite true. There was a great deal of culture and civilization outside the Roman Empire and in terms of their cruelty and rapacious greed for territory, the Romans were the Nazis of the ancient world.

22nd August

527 years ago today the last king of England to die in battle, Richard III, was killed at Bosworth. Now, I know what you're thinking. How can a blogger who calls his bike White Surrey after Richard's horse be anything other than biased on this subject. Let me assure you that as a professional historian I am fully aware of the strict importance of objectivity and scrupulous impartiality.

I am also fully aware that the Duke of Richmond, who beat Richard at Bosworth (unfairly) was the most disreputable, rancid, vengeful and paranoid ruler ever to sit on the English throne.

See?

In other news ...
Oliver Lodge, the physicist, died today in 1940. Or, since he was an ardent believer in spiritualism, did he?

21st August

Today was the day, in 1858, when General Sam Browne (he of the Cavalry) designed a brilliant new sword belt. He'd lost an arm during the Indian Mutiny of the previous year and found drawing his sword difficult because swords were slung by two loose straps from a waist belt. The 'Sam Browne' carried a sword frog that held the weapon close to the hip and could be drawn with one hand.
They don't make them like that any more.

In other news ...
The first Cadillac, the Rolls-Royce of American car design, appeared today in 1902. It had so many additional features ((four wheels, steering wheel, doors etc) that they immediately wrote a song about it - Knick Knack Cadillac.

20th August

Back in the Chariots of Fire year (1924) today, Scottish athlete Eric Liddel famously refused to run the 100 metres at the Paris Olympics because the race was run on a Sunday and he was a devout Christian. If everybody had done that, doing nothing but praying on Sunday, I doubt there would have been any Olympic Games at all.

In other news ...
Today in 1839 Louis Daguerre and Isidore Niepce showed the Academie des Sciences in Paris how their brillant photographic techniques worked to bring us the world's first effective photographs. They were called Daguerrotypes as opposed to Henry Fix Talbot's Talbottypes and George Eastman's Eastmanotypes. Which goes to show, in photography, it takes all types.

19th August

Coco Chanel was born today in 1883 and made a name for herself in fashion design. Which was odd bearing in mind the orange up-and-down hair, red nose, wide check trousers and huge shoes she always wore were something of an acquired taste.

Perhaps it was the water-squirting buttonhole that did it.

In other news ...
Today in 1934 the German people went to the polls to vote whether Adolf Hitler should be allowed to use the title Fuhrer. 38 million said yes. The 4 million who said no were shot.

18th August

Robert Redford, born today in 1937, tells the best put-down story about himself of any Hollywood icon. He was driving around LA one day at the height of his fame when he saw a crowd of people waving at him and calling. He thought he'd give them a treat, so he pulled over and wound down his window, at which point and excited you woman said breathlessly, 'Robert Redford, you asshole!'

In other news ...
And talking of assholes, Temujin died today in 1227. Better known as Genghis Khan (the Great Lord) he brought terror and destruction to millions from his native Mongolia to the Black Sea. Adolf Hitler was recently voted the most evil man of all time - by people who'd never heard of Genghis Khan!

And by the way, if you ever want to see probably the worst film ever made starring a Hollywood A-lister, watch The Conqueror starring John Wayne as Temujin. Oh dear!

17th August

One of the most bizarre murder stories of all time came to light today in 1980 when baby Azaria Chamberlain went missing from a camp site at Ayers Rock in Australia. Azaria's mother, Lindy, claimed that a dingo took the sleeping child from their tent. The body was never found.
There were three problems with this case -
a) The Chamberlains belonged to a religious sect and that made them suspect in the eyes of many people.
b) Ayers Rock was an ancient Aboriginal site linked with child sacrifice and finally
c) the Green Lobby said that dingoes were harmless, God's creations etc etc and would not take a child.

After umpteen trials, hearings and years of anguish to the Chamberlain family, the case has finally been closed. My message to the greens out there?

The dingo did it. They are vicious wild animals and have attacked humans both before and after Azaria Chamberlain.

In other news ...

Rudolf Hess, Hitler's deputy, died today in 1987. He had been the only prisoner in Spandau Gaol, Berlin for years, having been sentenced to life for Nazi war crimes at Nuremberg. He was alleged to have strangled himself with electrical flex hooked onto a window frame. the only problem with that is that he was physically incapable of doing it, having had a stroke previously. All the evidence points to murder but because of the man's reputation, no serious investigation ever took place.

16th August

This was a date (along with 7th December) to live in infamy. Today in 1819 a peaceful, unarmed crowd of weavers and spinners turned up on St Peter's Fields, Manchester, to listen to the demagogue Henry Hunt talk about universal suffrage, a right we now all have and take for granted. The size of the crowd (perhaps 60,000) alarmed the local magistrates who sent in the Yeomanry to arrest Hunt. In the ensuing chaos, the cavalry attacked the crowd, who stampeded in panic and eleven people were killed, with hundreds more seriously injured.

When I visited St Peter's Square, Manchester, some years ago, there wasn't a single plaque or dedication to those victims visible. I believe there is now - and about time. The authorities of the Cottonopolis should be ashamed of themselves.

In other news ...

Elvis Presley died today in 1977. Or did he? I mention this only because he is probably the most frequently sighted corpse in history, so perhaps today in 1977 has no significance whatever. He would be seventy seven now (... is seventy seven ...?) so might not be rocking quite so much as he did. Swivelling a hip when it is not one's own is generally accepted as being pretty tricky.

15th August

The Scottish king died today in 1057. I can't mention his name of course, in deference to my thespian friends (there's never been a law against that, by the way) but you know who I mean. Shakespeare made up the twaddle about the murder of Duncan, the mad wife, the tendency to see daggers everywhere and the marching wood of Dunsinane. And he pinched most of that from a bloke called Hector Boyce who went on to write the screenplays of several of the Hamish Macbeth (oh, damn!) series.

In other news ...

I had to put my cane away today in 1977. Actually that's a bit of a metaphor. I never used the cane in my life (my private life is my private life) and note how sneaky it was of the government to ban corporal punishment in schools during the summer hols - how are you enjoying the hols, by the way, parents? Tired of the little dears yet? They can be tiring, day after day, can't they?

Where was I? Oh yes - I didn't use the cane, I just used the old, tried and tested methods of plugging little delinquent Johnny into the mains, hanging willful Sarah up by the hair and forcing the whole of Seven bee Oh to eat a Jamie Oliver school dinner.

Parents - don't try this at home.

14th August

One of the greats of Hollywood died today in 1932. Rin Tin Tin passed away after a long battle with the cat next door. You may remember Rin in such epics as Dog Day Afternoon, For Whom the Ball Rolls, Straw Dogs and Reservoir Dogs. He caused controversy when he was turned down for the part of Old Yeller on the grounds of his colour and Black Beauty on the grounds of his species. He was technical adviser on Kevin Costner's Dances with Alsatians, itself a remake of the French classic Chien Autumn.

His favourite director was Anthony Mann, hence RTT's description of himself as 'Mann's best friend'.

In other news ...

The Colony of Virginia held its first legislative assembly today in 1619. They had powers granted to them by the British crown to pass certain local laws. What a golden opportunity! And what did they do? Passed laws against drinking and gambling.

Moral: You can take the Puritans out of England, but they'll probably all move to Virginia.

13th August

Annie Oakley was born on this day in 1860. If you think the recent Olympic shooting was good, you should have seen this girl. 'Little Miss Sureshot' could hit the thin edge of a playing card at 30 paces. Nobody messed with Annie!

In other news ...

... and 28 years later, John Logie Baird was born. The Scots are famous inventors and none more so than this bloke. Having designed the world's first television set, he then went on to star in one of the small screen's most lovable cartoon series. For legal reasons, of course, the name had to be changed slightly, so somebody in Head Office came out with the name Yogi Bear.

They kept in character, though, because he certainly was smarter than the average bear; or human being, come to think of it!

12th August

Sorry I'm late with this one, but I've just been out on Leighford Common blasting grouse with my Purdy. All right, none of that is true, but I just want you to be aware of the social class from which I emanate.

Now, to History Business ...

William Blake, poet, artist, visionary and kook, died today in 1827. His poems are pretty good - 'Tyger! Tyger!' etc but his art is awful; he was a very poor man's Michelangelo, with flat, derivative scenes mostly from the Old Testament.

In other news ...
The last of the Quaggas died in Amsterdam zoo today, in 1883. Zebediah Quagga was out for a stroll in the elephant house when he suffered a fatal heart attack.

Shame. He leaves no next of kin.

May I also take this opportunity to wish a very happy birthday to the very lovely Eloise Campbell-Bowling, esteemed photographer and demon Yahtzee player. To see what she gets up to when not beating me into the ground at Trivial Pursuit (I know ... I know ... a few lucky throws is how I like to think of it) visit  here

11th August

Today in 1932, President Herbert Hoover was the first man in the US to talk sense in twelve years. He said it was time to scrap Prohibition, an unworkable attempt to curb drinking which merely played into the hands of organized crime. Thanks, Herbert - and thanks too for that vacuum cleaner jobbie; excellent. Now the people of America can drink themselves silly (legally) while cleaning their carpets.

In other news ...
Enid Blyton was born today in 1897. Much rubbished in her own time and since for bad literature, she introduced us to a magic world of kids' adventure infinitely better than Harry Potter and was a champion of political incorrectness with Golliwogs and Mr Plod the policeman.

Come back, Enid, all is forgiven.

10th August

One of the world's most important gadgets was patented today in 1889 in Barnsley, not a place usually associated with cutting edge technology. It was the screw-top bottle. So how come it took wine snobs 120+ years to become aware of it?

In other news ...
Today in 1949 John George Haigh, the 'acid bath' murderer, was executed at Wandsworth Prison. He was a petty con man who turned to murder for profit but completely misunderstood the meaning of corpus delicti. He presumed that if no body was found, a charge of murder would not stick. WRONG! And anyway, they found enough of Olive Durand-Deacon's false teeth to convict him anyway, because his chemistry was pretty rubbish as well.

9th August

Admiral Maarten Harperzoon Troup was killed today in 1653 in a battle with the English fleet off the coast of Holland. I have no comment to make on the man's ability as a sailor (which was considerable) but I have to inform my reader that a recent MORI poll chose him as having the silliest name in History.

In other news ...
Brighton opened its first nudist (oops, sorry, naturalist) beach today in 1979. Already dubbed 'Sin City' and the 'Gomorrah of the South', Brighton was assured of the arrival of an army of oddballs in macs (and a handful of naturalists). As an anonymous poster at the time brilliantly put it, 'If God wanted us to walk around naked, we would have been born that way.'

Distressingly, Mrs Troubridge took to naturism in a big way in response to this innovation. I was away on holiday at the time, but the neighbours opposite took the full brunt, as one might say, of her new hobby and they have never been quite the same since.

8th August

Richard Nixon resigned today in 1974 over 'errors of judgement' including the Watergate scandal. He remains the only US President in History to have resigned, although an awful lot more of them should have.

In other news ...
Talking of which, Vice President Spiro T Agnew was under investigation the previous year for tax evasion. See? It's everywhere.

7th August

Martha Tabram died today in 1888. She was probably the first victim of the still unidentified serial killer Jack the Ripper aka the Whitechapel Murderer. The Metropolitan Police are a little stretched at the moment with the Olympic security issue, but just as soon as the Games are over, they have promised Press and public they'll be right on it.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jack-Ripper-Killer-M-J-Trow/dp/1845631269/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1344262511&sr=8-1

As you can see, I have added a link - or have I? It's a mystery and no mistake, this computer stuff. If I have you will find yourself on Amazon, where you can buy an excellent book by my old mate M J Trow on who Jack the Ripper really was .... possibly.

In other news ...
A UFO was sighted over Basle in Switzerland on this day in 1556. Was it a bird? Was it a plane? Was it Clark Kent? Whatever it was, it was the only thing to have happened in Switzerland since William Tell tried to murder his own son and pretended it was a feat of extraordinary marksmanship.

6th August

The Holy Roman Emperor Francis II abdicated today in 1806. That was because Napoleon told him that he wasn't Holy, nor Roman, nor much of an Emperor. So he threw his toys out of his pram and went home.

In other news ...
'Old Sparky' came to life today in 1890, the first time the contraption was used for an execution. The 'sitter' was the murderer William Kemmler and the place was New York. Under certain conditions, the new 'humane' method could take up to eleven minutes to bring about the death of the convicted felon.

5th August

'Everybody has a right to pronounce foreign names as he chooses.'

Who said that in 1951? The British Prime Minister and war leader Onestop Choochley.

In other news ...
George, Lord North, died today in 1792. If you haven't heard of this bloke

1. I'm not surprised
2. You're in good company
3. Neither had x thousand American colonists during the War of Independence.

He was actually Britain's Prime Minister during that whole debacle and they should all be eternally grateful to him.

4th August

The 'war to end wars' broke out today in 1914. The Kaiser, Wilhelm II, said, 'We draw the sword with a clear conscience and clean hands.'

Well ... er ... not really. Although Germany was only one of many countries whose peacetime alliances led them to war, the Kaiser's usual toast with his senior officers on manoeuvres was 'Der Tag' (The Day). What day? The day when Greater Germany would dominate Europe.

In other news ...
Waiting For Godot opened tonight in 1955 in London's West End. About half the audience walked out before the end. The others were already undergoing psychotherapy. But then, 'every man has his Sidcup'. How true, Samuel, how true; but I liked you better when you were Archbishop of Canterbury.

3rd August

'The lamps are going out all over Europe,' said Lord Grey, the British Foreign secretary today in 1914. 'We shall not see them lit again in our lifetime.' Everybody assumes he was talking about the First World War, soon to erupt with appalling casualties. Actually, recent research has now discovered, he was talking about an indefinite strike by the European Lamplighters' Union.

Duh!

In other news ...
On this day in 1926 the first traffic lights (after a Victorian attempt that failed) were installed at Piccadilly Circus. They'd stopped working by 4th August.

2nd August

Today in 1100 William Rufus (the ruddy) was killed while hunting in the New Forest. There is a stone to mark the spot there today and most people who picnic near it have absolutely no idea who he was. He was a thoroughly unpopular, objectionable git who was probably murdered on the orders of his younger brother.
The moral of this story is - if you are thoroughly unpopular and objectionable, don't go hunting with your brother's mates. You have been warned.

In other news ...
Today in 1918, an Allied Force of British, French and American troops landed at Archangel to try to overthrow the Bolshevik government of Lenin, Trotsky and their good ol' boy comrades. The gambit failed but it was fun while it lasted. My favourite adventurer in this was an English eccentric called Locker-Lampson who went around Russia in an open armoured car machine-gunning everything that moved.

Heigh ho for the open road!

1st August

Sorry, reader, for this post going up so late, but we all take Lammastide very seriously chez Maxwell and the Precepts of St Bill Gates state quite categorically 'Thou shalt not touch thy keyboard on Lammastide; neither shalt thou post blogs thereon.' So, it really couldn't be clearer, could it?

Anyhoo ...

Claudius was born today in 19 BC. Obviously, it wasn't 19 BC then on account of Himself not being born for another 19 years. Claudius was one of those brilliant mind-like-a-razor types hiding it all under a limp and a stammer (Kevin Spacey did something similar in The Usual Suspects). What Claudius did not do was invade Britain in 43 AD (and it really was 43 Ad then for obvious reasons). The actual invasion was done by General Aulus Plautius. Claudius turned up after it was all over (typical) to pick up the applause, the statues, slaves, grain, women and everything the Romans had a habit of pinching.

In other news ...
Joseph Priestley announced today in 1774 that he'd discovered oxygen. That's a bit like Claudius really - millions of people had done all the hard work for ever, breathing the stuff in, only for some clever dick to come along and invent a word for it. Never mind, the good people of Birmingham burned his house down later and threw him in a pond, so - although he didn't think so - there is a God.