14th October

Cliff Richard was born on this day in 1940. If you've seen recent photos of the man, you'll know this has to be a typo. He was clearly born in 1990.
Or does he have a painting of himself in the attic ...?

In other news ...

The world came to an end today - although Mother Shipton never noticed it - in 1969. The ten bob note was replaced by a nasty-foreign-looking coin called a 50p. I'd have been happier had it been called a 120p, but you can't have everything.

13th October

The Turin Shroud, allegedly the cloth wrapped around Jesus' crucified body, was finally exposed as a hoax today in 1988. This shouldn't have surprised anybody. For centuries, the Catholic Church had been making money out of exhibiting the chains of St Peter, the finger of St Anthony and the foreskin of Sister Ursula (oh no, that can't be right!) and all of those where fakes, so why not the shroud?

The real miracle is how did a brilliant 14th century artist fake the thing in the first place?

In other news ...
The Queen, God Bless Her, made her first broadcast to the nation today in 1940. She was only 14 and said, on Children's Hour 'We know, every one of us, that in the end all will be well.'

And the old girl's been calming us all down ever since.

12th October

The first non-religious piece of music was published today in 1609. It was Three Blind Mice and isn't it an off thing to kick of Showbiz with? Burt Bacharach, who wrote it, dined out on the royalties for the rest of his life.

In other news ...
Aleister Crowley was born today and spent the rest of his life telling everybody what a beast he was. His phone number was 666 (as opposed to the Pope's which is VAT 69); his favourite dish was devilled kidneys and he liked children, but couldn't eat a whole one.

11th October

Jean Cocteau, poet, artist, film-maker and all round brilliant wit died today in 1963. Of all the cool things he ever said, my favourite must be 'Tact consists in knowing how far we may go too far.'

Ain't it the truth?

In other news ...
And talking of wits and great lines, how about this today in 1991 from Auberon Waugh (whom I actually met once) - 'Politicians can forgive almost anything in the way of abuse; they can forgive subversion, revolution, being contradicted, exposed as liars, even ridiculed but they can never forgive being ignored.'

Takes one to know one, Aub!

10th October

Charles Darwin published what he considered to be his major opus today in 1881. It was called Formation of Vegetable Mould through the Action of Worms with Notes on Their Habits. Just a reminder about other immortal works penned by the greats: Harriet Beecher Stowe's The Outbuilding belonging to a family Relative Whose Name was Thomas: Karl Marx's A List of the Principles and Beliefs of People Who Believe in Complete Equality: Robert Graves's Myself, Tiberius Claudius Drusus Nero Germanicus and finally Peter Benchley's The Mandibles of a Large, Pale Predator Fish and Its Homicidal Habits.

Darwin's book was later filmed as Tremors and Its Many Sequels.

In other news ...
Thelonius Monk was born today in 1920. For years I thought his name was Felonius and that he was probably a defrocked priest. His crime? He virtually invented bebop.

'Nuff said.

9th October

'Che' Guevara was shot dead by the Bolivian army today in 1967. Let's forget how ludicrous it was that a self-centred, rather useless asthmatic medical student could become the icon of a generation (mine) appearing on posters and t-shirts without number. Let's have a closer look instead at the Bolivian Army. They shot Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid too. Is nobody doing anything about this?

In other news ...
Today in 1897, Henry Sturmey drove away from Land's End in a 4.5 hp Daimler with the intention of being the first person to drive to John O'Groats - 929 miles. Today, because of roadworks, contraflow, traffic cones and utterly unnecessary 50 mph speed limits on open roads, that journey would take five days.

Turn around when it is safe to do so.

8th October

Count Metternich (no, not the furry version, the real one) was appointed Foreign Minister in Vienna today in 1809. He stayed in office until 1848 as 'the coachman of Europe' directing and manipulating everybody with his craftiness and army of secret police. That's why I gave that cute little bundle of fur the name all those years ago - I can recognize a serial killer when I see one.

In other news ...
Chicago almost burned to the ground today in 1871 when Mrs O'Leary's cow knocked over a lantern in a barn in Dekoven Street. Under interrogation, using the good cow, bad cow (and incidentally giving the name to an otherwise anonymous disease) system we've all seen so many times, the animal confessed to being a serial arsonist, admitting to similar fires in London (1666), Warwick (1694) and London again in 1861.